Hello everyone!
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| photo taken in one of my favourite spots in my hometown. I'm pretty positive that's where I was when I decided to write this blogpost |
Today I decided to do a slightly different post, one that I came up with while desperately trying to finally publish something here on the blog. I always dread this creeping feeling at the back of my mind that reminds me I haven't posted anything here for too long and I should be more consistent, more organized, more hard working and more-god-knows-what. Ironically, that's when I suffer from the biggest writer's block.
Since I started this blog a couple of years ago, I have had several attempts to publish regularly - once a week, twice a week, every other day etc. It never worked. Not even once. I got extra stressed for some reason, felt enormous pressure and the quality of my posts (in my opinion) would always take a knock. Then, on the other hand, there were days when I would have 100 ideas per minute and was ready to publish them all in one day. Then there was a break for a month or longer sometimes, the blog was quiet and the annoying feeling would slowly appear again.
The thing is, neither of these states of creativity (or lack thereof) is good in the long-run. One leads to frustration, the other - to quick burnout, and both take their toll on the content I create.
After the last blogpost and before this one, I have already written, photographed and proofread at least three other posts. The only thing left to do was to click publish and yet - something just wouldn't click (pun intended). The posts were fine, I just didn't feel like I'm 100% happy with the final outcome. I'm perfectionist by nature so I had to learn to tell myself that done is indeed better than perfect, but sometimes even that is not the case. Embracing the flaws is an essential part of being genuine.
Sometimes it just does not feel right even if I put all my heart into creating one short entry.
And that's when I like to ask myself Is this really authentic? Am I staying true to myself?
Sometimes I push myself to create content that feels natural at first, but by the end of the process it seems to be nothing but detached from what I'd wanted it to be. And I'd rather not post at all than post something that doesn't sit right with me.
I guess the point I'm trying to make with this post is that even though sometimes there is nothing going on here for weeks on end, I'm still out there. Planning, creating other content, taking pictures and collecting inspiration from different sources. This blog started as my online (yet very personal) diary where I talk about everyday, sometimes insignificant things. A safe place for me as a writer and hopefully for all of you out there as readers, where nothing is forced and overdone.
I promise I'll be back very soon, my DMs are always open for you. My beloved autumn is coming and I welcome it with open arms, ready for a fresh start.
Sending endless love to all of you,
Your Darka
♡
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